Electronic License Plates/ Billboards On Your Car

California in it's desperation to tap into any revenue stream is thinking about a lame and dangerous idea.

Electronic License Plates.

So it would be an LED sign similar to those on the sides of the freeway that tell traffic conditions or flash Amber Alerts. When the car is in motion it is the plate of your car, the numbers and letters. When you stop for 4 seconds or more the license plate becomes an ad. This would generate cash for the cash strapped California.

So as you are sitting there you are advertising for Best Buy or Denny's. Whomever had paid them to use your car as a mobile billboard. If you love the Lakers, you can pay to have your own message printed on your own car!

Um, Fuck you.

Firstly, if I have my car used as a billboard by someone who has a wrap around sign on the paint, I get paid. It's my car. I should get paid. It's my property. I should get some remuneration for my stuff being used. Is the state of California going to stop charging fees for license plates? They have this new revenue stream, they don't need us then. They will all be free, right?

2. Distracted drivers with cell phones, ipads, & fax machines are already a huge problem. The feeble minded drivers will now have flashing signs to divert their attention when stuck on the freeway. When the freeway is shut down for a particularly horrendous accident, the entire back up will have something to read... I don't want that. I want these people to pay attention to their job. Driving. During an accident, how many other accidents happen? Rubbernecking of an accident will also be rubbernecking to see when there is a sale at Macy's.

Thirdly, the California legislature needs to stop grasping at straws. Not every money making idea that is floated should be taken seriously. How much would it cost to make all the license plates become signs? How do you convert the millions of cars to this new system? It's ridiculous. If California decides to do some Manifest Destiny and make your house into an electronic billboard, doesn't that violate your rights?

4. Okay, I don't want to sound paranoid, but for this system to work, do you have the same ad on your car everywhere you go, or does it change ads as you travel from one city to the next? Do you have an ad for Safeway in San Francisco and then one for Vons in LA and San Diego? Something would have to tell this system that you are no longer in LA and change it for SF. So this tracking of ads would also track your car's movements. In the world of too much personal information being transmitted, isn't this a tracking system? Couldn't this black box be used in some way?

I hope this mobile sign doesn't happen. I get nothing out of it for the state to use my vehicle. But I will be the first in line to ask for a government grant to study the rise in accidents on the roads attributed to this new technology.

Right after I have my car registered in Arizona.

Tattoos

I've been looking at peoples tattoos lately. And I gotta say, I'm generally not impressed. I wrote about body modification in February of this year. To restate, I have no tattoos or piercings. (Until I can have wings that work, I'm not getting anything done.)

I don't know why but I'm thinking that tattoos which I once found kind of cool, have gotten boring and so common place that they are no longer cool, hip, or edgy. Tattoos have reached the tipping point by being on almost everyone that they lost some magic.

Also I think it might be size and frequency. On women a small tattoo is kind of sexy; on the ankle or some such. When they have a sleeve done, or huge wings on their backs, or something large half covered by just normal clothes, I find it kind of distracting and not very sexy. Or if there are 2 dozen small ones all over the place. It looks odd.

I was talking to someone who was going to get her recently deceased dog's inital on her wrist. I asked why. "Because my dog taught me patience." Um, so you forget to have patience unless you have the dog's intial on your wrist? I don't understand the memory part of tattoos. I have a stunning memory. I don't need a tattoo to remember things. Generally I would like to forget.

Another person I was talking to had a tattoo lasered off. It was her dog's name and a blue rose. The tattoo artist went freestyle and screwed up, misspelling the name! I always wondered about that. What happens if they screw up? Well, the tattoo artist lost her job, and the owner of the place paid to have it lasered off. Let's do the math. $125 for a incorrect tattoo, $1800 for 10 sessions of laser tattoo removal. Priceless.

I guess the world needs to find a new way to be edgy. By being unmarked, maybe I'm edgy...

18 --- Head Age

I was at a birthday party for someone I know. He turned 61.

There were made up lyrics for the song "When I'm 64" that referenced the things in life that happened to Larry. The loss of hair, the replaced hip, things like that. Things that remind people their age.

I've never really liked those joke birthday cards that say "Wow! You are fucking old!" I find them rather mean and not funny when people are looking at their lives getting shorter as they live longer.

When I was sitting outside, most everyone had left and people were cleaning up, for some reason I asked how old Larry was in his head.

Without hesitation he said, "18."

It took me a long time to figure out that the chronological age someone has on their driver's license is not the age they think of themselves, or view themselves in their heads.

I think the "Head Age" I am is probably the reason I feel, at many times in my life, like a kid. And I don't know what the fuck I'm doing sometimes.

Bad Parenting... 2 Examples?

In the news lately there have been outraged people talking about bad parenting. The reason?

Example 1:

Abby Sunderland's failed attempt to sail solo around the world. They say she is too young! It's too dangerous! She's only 16! No sixteen year old is capable or mature enough! Her parents shouldn't have let her do it!

Well, her 16 year old brother did it the year before. She has been sailing most of her life. Her Dad is a life long sailor. The kid was practically raised on a boat. Abby came up with the idea at 13 years old. She knew the risks and the things that could possibly happen. Her brother did it just last year. So I'm sure he told her all about it.

So what is the problem? Is it really bad parenting or is it knowing your kid and letting them be themselves?

I think everyone is different. The things that make someone freak out don't phase other people. There are millions of 16 year olds who would never be able to cope with a solo trip around the world even at the age of 35 being hale and hearty. That's not who they are. They don't look at something as adventurous, they see it as dangerous. They are too safe. The most danger they have is driving the freeway, or a tub without the stickers that keep you from slipping.

The danger for her was real. Storms, pirates, mechanical problems. There are all sorts of things that can happen. But if your read her blog, the one she did as she sailed, http://soloround.blogspot.com/ you'll see this kid is not an ordinary kid.

She had bad weather and it snapped her mast. She also did everyting she needed to to secure rescue. She is safe and I, as an adventure loving person, am glad she is alright.

Would her parents be bad parents if she had been successful in her attempt?

Example 2:

13 year old Jordan Romero climbed Everest. This is something that has killed many older more experienced climbers. If you read Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer you realize just how crazy dangerous it is to climb Everest. But the kid did it with his dad and others becoming the youngest to ever summit Everest.

Is this also an example of bad parenting? Jordan came up with it at the age of 9. He saw a listing of the 9 tallest peaks at school and told his Dad that he wanted to climb all of them. What did his Dad say to that?

"We better start training."

That, in my opinion, is great parenting. His Dad didn't say it's dangerous or too expensive or crazy for a 9 year old to want to do it, he told him it would take work and commitment with that one simple sentence.

He lives in Big Bear, California, so there's a lot of places to train. If it were just a thought that was soon to be forgotten, the training part of it would have stopped the kid when it got too hard. He wanted to do it.

Is mountain climbing dangerous? Yes. But I think sitting on your ass playing playstation is a lot more dangerous and detrimental to the kids of today. Look at the number of adults who waste time playing video games?

Bubble wrapping kids so they never get hurt, giving every child who participates in a sport a trophy at the end to improve their self esteem, that's crazy. Do you look at virtual rollercoasters on-line, representations of real roller coasters, ones that you can really ride but are too afraid to? Or do you get on the roller coaster and have the adventure?

I prefer a world with real roller coasters, mountains to climb, and seas to cross. It's supposed to be an adventure.

Where, O Where Has My Manager Gone?

Back in march of 2009 I signed with a small managment company. I was not certain aobut what she could do for me, but I didn't have any other representation at the time so I figured I'd give her a try. Maybe it would be AWESOME!

It was not awesome. She asks all her clients to email her on Monday of every week and tell her what their schedules are for the week. This I found odd. I've had agents and managers before and none of them ever asked for me to check in with them at the start of every week. This was also a problem because I don't really know what my schedule is most weeks, and it can change with a phone call. I tried to let her know what I was up to, but then after 2 months of this endeavour I let it slide.

Her job is to get me a fucking audition. It's my job to show up no matter what. And in the past with previous agents, 19 times out of 20 I made it to the audition.

In September I put out a general query to my FB profile friends. Is it better to have no agent, or to have a bad one? Everyone thought bad was better than none. Right when I was about to call it a day with her, in October she got me an audition. Fuck. I went to the audition but I didn't get called back. I was too tall to do a scene with a short actor.

She got me one audition in 6 months. Then nothing.

I was thinking about her and mulling over the task of contacting her to tell her I was no longer interested in being her client. I started to write an email. Then I happened to look her up on IMDb Pro. It listed her clients. I was not listed. I looked at Actors Access. I had no representation listed. Then I went to check my credit report to see if there was anything strange going on. I had given her all the information you would need to do identity theft. That's just an unfortunate part of the business since these people are your advocates... Nothing weird was going on. I was relieved to find that out. So she was honest, but had no ability to get me a damn audition.

But I was annoyed. At some point she decided to no longer represent me, but never let me know. When did it happen? No idea. I thought about emailing her to tell her off. But that isn't what a professional does. It would have been nice for her to act professionally to tell me she was cutting me loose. I had a commercial agent give me that much consideration ages ago. After I had already started looking for a new agent because he hadn't gotten me out in 12 months...

I have spent a lot of time here in LA talented but either under respresented or unrepresented.

Back to unrepresented...

Overcoat Theory

For some reason I was thinking about something you see in movies and on TV occassionally. A woman shows up at a guy's door in an overcoat and she's nude underneath. The reason is obvious and 9 times out of 10 the offer is accepted. I don't know if this happens a lot or is it just one of those movie things. But I must say it could only be pulled off by women.

What is the inverse of this paradigm? A man in an overcoat is a flasher. It's a funny or gross thing. Nothing really sexy about it.

And if you think about the logistics of the whole thing (so to speak) it works for women because they are women. A woman can wear an overcoat with a short skirt and heels and no one automatically assumes she is nude underneath. The shoe option is important. Now if a man has bare legs below the coat and sneakers or dress shoes then something is weird... If he goes to the trouble to cut pant legs off and secure them to his legs via rubber bands so that he looks like he is wearing pants, he's a flasher.

And there's a difference in anatomy, obviously. A nude woman doesn't have to do anything. She's awesome as is. A man has the option to be flaccid, (which would not be at all impressive) or self fluff. Which just makes him a wanker in the dark standing on a doorstep. And that could be embarrassing if the woman goes outside to get the mail. Or lives in an apartment complex. Neighbors walking their dogs would call the police.

I don't know. It's just something that went thru my head. Scary how my brain works sometimes...

California Elections

Meg Whitman spent $81,000,000 of her own money to run for the Republican nomination for Governor of California. Yeah, she's a Billionaire, but to me, that's nuts. As a Billionaire I'm sure she's in touch with the common men and women of the state. (As they clean her house and mow her lawn.) Also some of the things she is saying about the California governing is a bit nuts to me. She's railing at big spending and all sorts of things that have been going wrong in Sacremento.

Um, Governor Arnold is a Republican. You are railing at your own party for how fucked up the state is.

She proposes firing 40,000 state employees. Um, so to create jobs, you are firing 40,000 people? Aren't those people going to be a drain on the state because they will be collecting unemployment? That doesn't make sense. The economy is slow right now. It's taking people an inordinately long period of time to find a new job. So 40,000 freshly unemployed people is good how?

Why does she want to be governor? I don't get it. Altruism isn't normal in people who run for office. Ego is. Arrogance is. Thinking they know all the answers is. Seldom do they have the answers. And then they realize they are supposed to work with people to accomplish things. That takes compromise.

Anyway. Oh Boy! now we get to watch politcal ads for the next 5 months until the election this fall. Where's the Tivo remote...

Dammit.

Someone has moved in upstairs. After almost 3 months I heard someone walking around on the hardwood floor above me. I was a bit shocked because there has been no one up there or even looking at the joint for well over a month.

My neighbor now describes the very nice family with 2 boys living above her as being "in Hell." The landlords got a hefty fine for renting a 2nd story apartment wiht hardwood floors to a family. In LA that is illegal. I can understand why.

I need a chance to talk to the guy above me. I pray that he doesn't have any dog. I don't care what size. The hardwood floors I can hear everything...

Fuck. It really seems like a good time to get the fuck out. To a single story, or guest house. Or something without all the bullshit caused by evil landlords. But then it's a case of income...

I swear, everytime I drive to my parking spot I look at my door to see if there is an eviction notice on it.

Pizza and Gunshots

I was working for a Director/Writer/Actor named Nick Murphy last night. I was Big Boss 1, 2, & 3 in his movie "Pizza and Bullets." It was a pretty simple concept. Say a line, get shot. (Change shirt and tie but keep the same suit.) Say another line, get shot. (Change shirt and tie.) Say one more line, take a bite of Pizza, get shot.

To differentiate between characters of 1, 2, & 3, I changed facial hair and hair style for a different look, and had a different accent for each one. So I went from a full beard to a goatee to clean shaven. It's tough to shave 14 days worth of beard quickly. And the make up artist had never watched someone shave before, so she watched me intently. Then we went back downstairs to touch up the make up and shoot me again. Literally.

I had fun. The shoot was fast. We were in Toluca Lake/ Burbank border, about 5 minutes from my place. I did the first Boss standing in the street. I did the line, I think, 5 times. Nick was to the left of the camera with a gun and silencer. I would hear "Action!" and say the line. Gun would twitch a bit, I would twitch a bit. I didn't have to take a bullet, fly thru the air, and land on hard pavement. Yay!

The beard was shaved a bit, I got powdered up quickly because we were losing light. There was some valiant guy on a ladder with a shiny bounce board angling the sun to another guy with a white bounce board shining the light on me. I was laying on the ground, my back up against the wall. Said the line 4 or 5 times. Gun twitched, I twitched. Moving on.

For the third I was told we would wait. That changed. I went up shaved off the rest of the beard and went back to makeup. This time I had a bit more time to get made up properly. They were lighting a couch next to the wall in this parking area. At the same time a sketch show was performing in the theatre we were behind. They were very nice people. I sat down on the couch when I was done with make up. They were still lighting; a pizza box was next to me. The DP I think his name was BJ. He apologized to me. I think he thought it was taking a long time. I'm just waiting to work, sitting on a comfy couch. Nothing to apologize for. At least not as far as I'm concerned. Waiting is part of the job. To get pissed of about waiting is silly.

I did a Jersey accent for the last boss. Nick had the gun on me and I said the line, took a bite out of the medium sized piece of pizza, and got shot. (I didn't want to wrangle a large piece of pizza. If I have a hard time with the prop, the scene becomes me fucking with a piece of pizza.) I did it again. The one more time. On the last take, the sketch show behind us started doing something with operatic style singing half way thru the take. We finished the scene. When someone said "Cut!" we busted up laughing. The music was serendipitous, and perfect for the scene. Nick wanted to see the play back. He liked the last take with the music, so I was wrapped.

I've never been one of those diva actors. I work both sides of entertainment. I work production and I work on stage. So I have seen the no talent insecure divas ranting and raging over the small things. I also worked 200 rock concerts and have seen all sorts of strange requests and ego driven mandates that made me determined never to be the problem on set. Waiting is a part of the business. I have worked production so I know how long things take and don't get pissed off about it. Part of my job is knowing what the fuck I'm supposed to do.

As an actor I've worked with some great professionals and watched their different styles of working. A good example was when I did Winter's Tale at the Globe. The 2 leads were George Deloy (Del Hoya) and Vaughn Armstrong. You didn't bother George before the show. He had to descend into madness quickly and needed his space. (He lightened up later in the run...) And Vaughn, moments before walking on the stage at the top of the show, would be singing dirty cowboy songs and flirting with the women in the cast. When the lights changed, he was all business. It was like a switch. He knew his job and did it well. I saw that both were valid ways to work, but I lean more to Vaughn's thinking.

I may do a post on how I approach acting... Succintly, say the lines, don't bump into the furniture.