John Boehner Is Not...

There has been a lot of GOP senators and congressmen who have been lately saying a very simple cop out phrase to deny science. Whether that science is climate change or fracking or some other thing they don't want  to address.

"I'm not a scientist..." They think that simple phrase gets them off the hook for the tough questions. But it's a bullshit answer. Ok, you aren't a scientist. But the people who wrote whatever report you don't want to acknowledge ARE scientists. They have been working in their fields for many years and they can state with authority that something is a scientific truth.

When a scientist comes up with something they think is  truth they publish a paper on the subject. This makes others in the field do experiments to see if they can disprove your findings. When more scientists get the same answer you did, it gets closer to being an accepted scientific truth.

So back to politicians. If they say they are not qualified to weigh in on a subject, they won't have to legislate or try to keep something bad, like rising sea levels, from happening. But that's bullshit. They were sent there to do tough things. Though it's difficult to do tough things when you only work 108 days a year...

So John Boehner is not a scientist. Fine. I have come up with a list of things he also is not.

John Boehner is not a  fairy princess.
... a short order cook at a greasy truck stop on highway 95.
... a dog walker in Central Park.
... a flamenco dancer called Juan Boner.
... a trashy romance novelist.
... a transexual scuba diving instructor in the Maldives.
... one third of a Vegas act called "The Orange Man Group."
... a superhero who fights crime using cigarette breath and whisky.
... a zombie extra on The Walking Dead.
... a thinking legislator...